Bury fire, bury life

If I bury my fire, I bury my life. Without it, I smother like coals smoldering to ash. For some, it entices and ignites. For others, many others, it seethes with attempts to choke-out and blacken. For those unready and unsteady, take on comfort like a cloak to the same. It’s the latest trend to follow the fashions of others. It’s the crowd-sourcing of sameness and all-holier-than in the sea of blondes. The bland paper trails of messages with little meaning, entitlement factor ramblings, and quote chucks of another. So caught up in following the crowds and people-pleasing, not to say too much this or too much of that, in doses of likeability. The sting of people-pleasing will suck your power center dry. I have found that you can people-please to comfort or teach-people to get uncomfortable, you cannot do both. I will say that comfort changes nothing. I am not here to make you comfortable. I am here alive and well in my own discomfort. It’s what houses me daily to move from my soul. I do not fear my fear itself, in fact, I thrive in my fear. I go to it, staying on its path, steady and focused. No longer afraid to get ahead myself or do the things I’m not ready for, tip-toeing on this earth does not teach me more than what I hold back. If I were to carry myself as though I were eggshells, I’d crack at every stare and snare or regurgitate every cheer. I do not fall back on my victim-hood or lead charges to control my relationships as so, that is for the weak and manipulative. I don’t care to walk with such. Show me the deepest and darkest parts of you and I’ll walk alongside your fire to witness. Not one above the other, standing together rising. I do lift you here for I am to brunt the weight of myself. There’s no pill dropping or tasting to offer than the shit I’ve poured and popped into my own. If it’s comfort you seek, fall back and stay, this gives you the certainty you crave. If you want to get real, you wise up and own your discomforts, what sets you off, and you’ll burn hotter and brighter than the neediness of gassy torches of another. You won’t need to torch yourself from the external, it’s all within. It is all within. I’ll steer the course of saying yes to what scares me the most.